GATE: thus uhh some stuff happened?
by Rash1writer
Summary: just some random omakes/side stories/short stories that i wrote... oh, also expect randomness. Don't don't the first few chapters seriously, or maybe don't take this mini chapters seriously at all... mostly the first one.
1. Dealing with the demi's

**First story! wooh!**

 **Disclaimer: the GATE ain't mine.**

 **Th** **is short story is just some stupid ideas of mine.**

 **Constructive criticism is allowed, (what does even constructive part mean?)**

* * *

 _ **Dealing with the demi's**_

 _jsdf compound, 11:00 PM_

 _JSDF pov_

JSDF guy: *radio chat* sarge! detected catgirls at 3 o'clock (east), orders sir?!

JSDF sergeant: *radio chat* how many?

JSDF guy: *radio chat* dozen!

JSDF sergeant: *radio chat* use lazers!

JSDF guy: *radio chat* sir we don't have lazer weaponries... oh *does evil grin*.

JSDF sergeant: *radio chat* someone get long range recording equipment!

 _Demi-humans (le catgirls) pov_

catgirl leader: *whisper* what are our mission?

all catgirl : *whisper* steal information from the men in green, give info to the imperials, get money.

catgirl leader: *whisper* goo- *see's red dot nearby*... wha-what is that?! *red dot moves further away* ca-capture it!

...

... this is stupid

... just imagine them chasing the dot round n round all night while making cute cat noises

... all night

 _2 days later_

 _Rare video recorded at "new world"_

 _*insert youtuber name*_

 _16,482,975,743 views [NEW]_

* * *

 **Hmm, since i don't know what to add in this part imma just review on what you think.**

 **also if you have any funny ideas PM me or something... bye?**


	2. goblin with a gun

**note: the previous chapter is not seriously written.**

 **another note: this is not a comedy chapter.**

 **be warned: you have been warned.**

 **Disclaimer: Gate:jieitai ain't mine.**

 **this chapter is one of my stupid ideas, like everything else.**

 **so i guess enjoy it?**

* * *

 _ **JSDF HQ, commander's tent**_

"YOU LOST YOUR WHAT?!" shouted by the general, angered by the action done by JSDF#1 (not creative in naming, sorry).

"... yes sir, i lost my pistol...sir" muttered JSDF#1 with guilt and DISHUNUR!

"*exhales* do you have any idea what would have happen if the imperials found it by chance? If they reverse engineered it? You know last thing we need right now is an endless, bloodthirsty, army who wants revenge upon us, equipped with firearms, right?" said by the general. "...now, tell me exactly how you lost it, with good detail that i can understand clearly" He added, full impatience and and anger.

JSDF#1: "... i was having a race."

General: "...a race..."

JSDF#1: "yes... a motorcycle race. The road was rocky and-"

General: "you know what? i don't care anymore, get your team, find it, or you don't find it, no grades FOR YOU AND YOUR TEAM!"

JSDF#1: "but si-"

general: "NO BUTTS FOR YOU!"

JSDF#1: "sir yes sir!" he shouted... with a tone full of DISHUNUR!

...

...(am i being a racist?)

* * *

 _somewhere in that said road where the pistol is dropped_

If you look at the road it's full of rocks and dirt and a pistol, a SIG Sauer P220 to be exact... now look at outside of the rocky road is a plain full of green and healthy grass... but if you look closely *camera zooms in* there is a green small goblin with his skin perfectly matching the color of the grass camouflaging himself perfectly, sleeping nice and soundly.

"giigiii..." it woke up, refreshed from his sleep, sitting up and looking left and right for intruders, then he saw something in the rode.

"shiinnnyyyyy..." ...(creepy) letting his instinct kick in he walked up to it sillily like a kid.

picking up the mystery thing, the green gollu- goblin inspected it with pure curiosity (don't point that barrel on your face... don't pull the trigger... at least it's on safety). If you want to know more of the goblin he is old, not THAT stupid, and has knowledge of some thing simple weapons and know how to kill.

so when he saw a hook under it it must be somekinda fishing hook! wait no that's stupid...

'hmm... a weird looking trigger system and... a high quality metal tube? is this some kinda magic bow-less crossbow?' he... wait... did he... thought that? wow... i guess they are... smart... anywho back to the story.

 **2 hours later** (sorry too lazy)

So he figured it out, well not how it works but how to use it, really well and some of it's concept... and guess what? He can use magic, what kind of magic is it? duplicating something small... i know what you're thinking... and yes, it is what you think it is, how does he know magic?

because i'm bored... and now he is attacking big imperial camps in the forest thats gonna surprise attack the JSDF,

and now he is gonna shoot them to steal their shit, gangsta style, because he doesn't know how to properly hold a gun.

 _"GII GII!"_

"huh? a goblin, heh, easy picki-" ***BANG!*** *headshot* that alerted the nearby imperials

"what in the gods nam-* said the general who came out of the tent ***BANG!*** *headshot*

"THE BEAST KNOWS MAGI-" ***BANG!*** *headshot*... triple headshot... damn now that is real gangsta.

"ATTACK THAT BEAS-" ***BANG!*** *headshot* and now the rest of the small army kill it.

 _"GII GII GIIIGIGIIGII!"_

A small group of imperials tried to approach it and slash it with its sword, which got shot.

Several archers tried to take a shot from a distance, the goblin did not move unfazed, missing it because of it's small size.

The goblin ran towards the army, did some grade-A acrobats that you can only see in videogames while shooting them like it's nothing.

The imperial army's iron armor was pierced like it was nothing.

He jumped to different tall trees, swung and dodge the incoming arrows, and still shooting AND hitting them like a badass.

Good lord look at him go, recking the army with only a pistol and infinite ammo and parkour skills.

oh shit look! he tree-wall run, jumped tree to tree and spun, and 360 NO SCOPE HEADSHOT MULTIPLE IMPS LIKE NOTHING!

If the goblin was put in every kids fps games he could reck them all.

The imperial are angry, pride crushed by a simple insect.

Then the cavalry came, and got shot.

Mages started making their spells, and got shot.

Archers missed, and shot.

horses ate their hays...

Every thing that is thrown to the little goblin is missed,

And hope is losing for them, every imps did their best to kill this abomination, to only fail.

If you look at the surrounding, everything is burning from the not-well aimed shot from the mages: Tents, bushes, trees, everything is burning.

Thick smoke rising, small debris collapsing.

Then the goblin saw there was the last soldier from afar, running away and abandoning his pride, the goblin shot both of he soldier's legs, clumsily tumbling and landed on his chest and screaming from the pain.

The soldiers used his hands to pull himself to safety, hopefully finding his allies and warn them, "grah!" he felt something holding his broken legs, he turned around to see the monster, stomping his legs, extremely bleeding, making him losing his consciousness slowly and stopping him in his tracks.

 _"gii giiii..."_ the soldier grabbed his knife holstered in his waist to stab the monster, the goblin shot both of the soldier's arms, "agh!" he screamed.

He saw a familiar item in the goblins hand 'that... thing...,' the soldier thought, 'how did this beast get his hand unto a men in green's weapon?!'

 _"giigigiiii..."_ the goblin smirked, aware of it's victory. Slowly and surely the goblin raised the pistol into the soldier's fabulous face.

"no...pls no..." in his mind, recalling his nation's defeat, looking at the weapon that killed his army, then at the monster, the soldier's eyes crying, showing pure fear.

"...pls, spare m-" ***BANG!***...

...

...

The goblin looked at his lifeless victim with a hole in his forehead, bleeding.

Ignoring everything around him, he laughed.

 _"giigiigiiigii"_

 _...IT LAUGHED!_

 _'GIHAHAHAHA!'_

He now knows the power in his hands, a piece of metal, able to kill an army.

 _'to think my magic is actually usefull..'_

looking afar, he saw another camp...

...

...

his next prey.

* * *

 **... not expecting that now are ya? this is nothing more than a practice, to be better at writing.**

 **to anyone who read this can someone tell me on how i did on this short chap?**

 **thanks! rash!writer out!.**

 **(i don't really know on what to add)**


	3. The shopkeeper

discaliemr; gate jitay not mine blahblbalba

* * *

 _'japanese thoughts'_

"japanese"

 _'falmartian thought's'_

 _"falmartian"_

 ** _Place/location/time/time skip/angry or scary dialogue_**

* * *

 **CHAP START!**

it's been a few months since the "men in green" came in the world of Falmart, and the natives of this world welcomed them with open arms, well except the imperial of course. The falmartian people knows that they are kind, will help those in need, and they understood the men in green just wanted revenge on the empire and rescue their people.

So when they heard the "jes-es-dee-ef" has opened the shop called "pee-ex stur" they quickly stormed in, curious on the product that the foreign world will offer, and by "they", almost all the refuges, traveling merchants, travelers, nomads, few magicians, ALL (well not that all). OF. THEM!

* * *

 ** _inside the store, 2:00 pm, 3rd pov_**

If you describe the word inside the place it would be full of life, quiet big for the customers to fit in, cool temperature, neat, and the shopkeeper being busy. REALLY BUSY, like black friday busy, but the whole mall is ran by 1 guy.

He thought it was gonna be an easy job, Say "welcome", nop the floor, place the products on the shelves, earn money, get sleep.

OH how wrong he is.

Andrew: " _sir that is a bucket not a helmet!"_

random traveler _: "sir? but i'm no knight..." 'HE KNOWS!'_

Andrew: _"oh, then mister?"_ 'Oh right! In Medieval Era people call knight 'sir''

random traveler _(or is he?): "it is fine lad."_ _'I MUST ESCAPE!'_

That's the shopkeeper, his name is Andrew, a half-american; A jsdf private, dark-ish blonde, built not for combat, but for brains, average build, smart, a quick learner and knows this world's language, learned almost completely in 2 months.

random mage: _"What magic is this!?"_

Andrew: _"that's a flashlight ..._ *looks left* hey you! no stealing! security!"

He gained quite an audience, helping those who don't know what that product is and what does it do, showing which one is food, telling the prices of the product, manning the cashier.

Andrew: _"no sir, you open it like this, pull this thing and viola, instant food."_

rich merchant: _"wait, instant?!"_

Andrew: _"yeah, want some? free taste test *gives opened canned corn beef*."_

rich merchant: _"free?...*eats canned corn beef* by the gods, this is heavenly!"_

The products in the shelves are quite numerous and diverse, from simple tooth brushes, canned foods, soaps, shampoos, ball-pens, bottled waters, soft drinks, random shirts and clothings, you know... very ordinary looking everyday life items to us, but to the natives? 100% no.

random traveler _: "A magic box that blows icy air? interesting!"_

random peasant _: "This... magical thing produces light?"_

Andrew: _"no magic done here..."_

random mage: _"pls tell me how this wonderful device works!"_

Andrew: _"you gonna buy or what?"_

They inspected each products with care and curiosity like buncha kids looking at something new. When they saw the price, they raced to the cashier instantly holding holding different kinds of merchandise, and some bought the "kand" food because of the merchant's outburst, who is actually famous around the place.

(AN: challenge, let's see if you're familiar on what the native's description on this 4 products.)

Most bought items like "bottle made of flexible glass", "fire-less torch", "wax-less candle", "very thin flexible bag,"

A random JSDF personnel wearing civilian clothing went in.

Andrew: _"oh, welcome to-_ takeo! dude how are you?! _"_

Takeo: "yo! Andrwe! sup?! *fist pump*"

Andrew: "it's Andrew you dumb nuts! hahaha! *fist pumps*"

FYI: Takeo is Andrew's friend during highschool, and the one who taught him Nihon.

Andrew: "how are you? you on break?"

Takeo: "i'm good and yes, rest day today."

Andrew: "so... is it true? *smirks* that you have a lady friend? or should i say... "pet"?"

Takeo: "*blush* eh hehehe... pet? no, future girlfriend? totally."

Andrew: "don't worry dude, i know the feeling of living a dream, *looks at customers* _oh! sorry for waiting!_ "

Takeo: "woops, sorry for disturbing ya. I forgot to buy something."

Andrew: "yeah you do that, _no miss we don't buy, we sell."_

* * *

 ** _5 hours later, 7:00 pm, still inside the shop._**

Andrew: 'finally! it's over'

Sweating and tired both physically and mentally, resting on his break and having a snack he quite enjoyed his job, mostly laughing internally on what some customers bought and their childly actions earlier. recalling the things happened;

A mage bought a shirt that says "let the force be with you", which he enjoyed wearing it from the comfort.

a hairy wolf guy wearing a shirt that says "fur fag" without knowing the meaning,

some natives blocking the entrance enjoying the cold windy breeze from the AC unit,

a falmartian child turning the lights on and off with a smile on his face, thinking he is some kinda wizard,

and i'm pretty sure some hairy (fur?) dog guy bought a...chew toy... a big one,

a child with a staff keeps questioning him on how everything around the shop works,

and if he remembered clearly he got seduced by a doll-like child with long and silky hair... what kind of parents would teach child like that?

Takeo was the last customer still in here, he can be actually helpful at times like earlier. He bought something normal, but his intentions on what he will use it for?

...

Andrew: "... *right eye uncontrollably twitching* lazer pointer, oregano, fake mouse, and... catnip..."

Takeo: "...*nervously smile*..."

andrew: '...wait a minute... i didn't see a catnip... where did he..."

... good thing there are no customers left...

...

...or it would've been awkward...

...

...ten minutes

...

...It all took ten minutes of silent awkwardness for Andrew to break it.

Andrew: '*facepalms mentally* this is one of the reasons why i hate you, otaku scum.'

Andrew: "do note that she is a person too, like us..."

Takeo: "i know, i know..."

Andrew: "... you know, when i said "pet" i meant that as a metaphor..."

Takeo: "...'

Andrew: "...Care to share? Before i call my superiors for... i don't know, animal abuse?"

Takeo: "Oh Andrew you are quite a joker hahaha!...*does nervous stare*"

Andrew: "... *does stare of death*..."

Takeo: "...ehehe...he...*scratches head*..."

Andrew: "...*crosses arms*... **E** **xplain**..."

Takeo: "Dude shill. I just need to get a start, you know, get her attenti-"

Andrew: "Through drugs?"

Takeo: "drugs?! No! What drug?"

Andrew: "dude, catnip is like drugs for cats..."

Takeo: "...really?"

Andrew: "Of course you don't know *massages eyes*, throw the catnip before you get in trouble, like always."

Takeo: "yea thanks for the note, Bye!"

Andrew: "*sigh*"

* * *

 _ **8:30 pm, JSDF barracks, random room.**_

 **Andrew pov**

After that hard work a general (who recommended me to work at the shop) saw me and doubled my payment this day, yay!

man, this world sure is something; real life magic and all that, elves and demi-humans, at least i'm not gonna get bored during work.

got a shower: check.

pajamas: check.

comfortable bed: check.

soft pillows: check.

neat blanket: check.

good! start Operation: sleep!

...

... *snores*

* * *

 **CHAP END!**

 **And that's a wrap! Hope you enjoyed this short side story of mine!**

 **saw wrong grammar? pls tell me. got writer tips for me to learn and get me gud? tell me.**

 **got any ideas? tell me, i'll write it (and credit those created that idea), if i have time that is.**

 **Rash!writer out!**


	4. simple guide of having a catgirl!

brian durnk again...

disclamer: don red dis

warning: GEYT JITAI NOT MINE

* * *

Do you ever want to have, like... i don't know, have a pe- i mean girlfriend/boyfriend that is uhh... A part animal of some kind? like say, a catgirl? or a catboy?

You know, a human with a cat tail near their butt and a pair of cuddly cat ears atop of their head?

Yes?

Well you are in luck my friend! for this short and very short will guide you on how to have one!

But first let me ask you one IMPORTANT question that is gonna affect on your quest of getting that puss- er, i mean your quest on having a supportive, lovingly, and cuddly person by your side.

So without wasting more time!

Query: do you, by any tini-tiny chance, live in a place called... "real life"?

If yes!...

Then you should totally go kill yourself and get reincarnated in a fantasy world, because if you don't, you will never succeed on getting a cuddly cat-girl girlfriend in heat and say "pound my pussy!"

...

...

... so boohoo to you, and maybe everyone else that read this bulshit.

If no!...

Then you are obviously lying!

THEEND!


	5. Kill me

warning: wrote this thing when i was/sometimes not/still brain drunk.

note: don't read this if you don't want something as shitty as this story or something.

I'm not even a full fledge otaku why am i writing this shit?

DISCLAIMER ALERT! GATE: jieitai ain't my wonderful creation.

Also expect some bad words!

The anime _GATE: Jieitai kanochi nite, Kaku tatakaeri_ was _**probably**_ created by a delusional EX-JSDF lieutenant who's bored in his job and quitted so he can create this shit so he can satisfy his dreams of banging a gothic-grandma kid, elf in tight ripped jeans, and an expressionless mage girl who doesn't give a fuck getting fucked (i mean look at her face), and his military **finally** fucking the wrong fucker **for so long** thanks to america nuking the shit outa them (they only defend themselves, not attack others now).

This is your fault america! Tsutomu Yamaguchi survived **twice** and anime existed!

* * *

 ***example*** \- sound effect

"example" - english dialogue

 _"example"_ \- foreign/falmartian language

* * *

 **REALLY SERIOUS WARNING!:** **After i finished creating this chapter i used all my remaining brain cells to warn you this,** **don't read this, i'm serious this is one of my bullshitiest chapter of all. I'm also surprise about the fact someone reads this story.**

 **.**

 **.**

 **.**

 **so without without wasting time,**

 **CHAPTER START! (don't hate me i warned you, k?)**

* * *

 _Universe: F4K Y34 1-1_

 _Planet: Democracy_

 _Continent: Freedom_

 _Country: United States of America_

 _Somewhere in_ _United_ _States of America_.

 _Some random city_ _in United_ _States of America_

...

It was a totally American day in America.

Proud democratic people shooting guns at the sky while shouting "Fuck yeah!"... why are they not getting arrested?

Well Dum-dum because today is a special day, today is _firearms day_.

ah yes, firearms, or in other's case, guns. The very backbone of our society.

It has been with us since for god know how long. Once you have one, you are a god,

but since all people have one… well i guess you're trash.

Let's talk on what a gun can do… it can do anything!

From scar-"freeing" your daughter's boytoy to cooking, killing to making music (ever heard Gun Sync? search it on YT).

A gun can do all!... as long as you have the correct gun mod/gun parts/accessories.

Which is expensive but who cares! guns are awesome!

but enough about its wonderful use, back to the topic!

 _Firearm's day_ is where people, from young to old, shoot's guns.

Why? didn't i already explained?

So expect a lot of people, no matter where you go, even a baby, holding a gun, or any kind of ballistic weaponry, today.

...

…hmm… i don't know what do think of anymore, so i'm just gonna go to the story.

yep… totally normal day...

birds getting shot, sun cooking people, heavily modified cars going here and there,

few different types of armored military vehicles roaming the street,

and of course...

 ***BANG***

 ***RATATATA***

 ***BRRRRRRRRT***

 ***pewpewpewpew***

 ***wapa- PWSHHH***

... guns blazing *puts on sunglasses*, cus _Firearms day. B)_

(now imagine all those crappy sound effects repeating and combined)

* **BOOOOM***

Was that a tank? Never mind.

(or just stab your eardrums. Wait this is written, not voice recorded. Enjoy that your ears are still functioning you lucky bastard.)

Until some inter-dimensional-magic-portal-bullshit gate appeared and blocked the highway.

*insert lots of car horns being horn-I MEANT **BEEPBEEPBEEP** *

seconds went by as the confused crowd got bigger, surrounding the mysterious structure.

"uhh… wha in de tarneysion eys dat?" said some drunk redneck holding his automatic triple barrelled sawed-off.

"why are we fucking standing here?" said some grandpa wearing ww2 uniform while holding his semi-automatic bolt-action rifle.

"Hey i'm late for work is someone filming here?!" complained some guy in that said highway, driving a shilka, kinda like a tank but instead of shooting a big-ass cannon it shoots 4 miniguns.

"look! something is coming out of it!" shouted by a 15 year old gothic girl holding her big-ass sniper rifle.

Then buncha creatures from fairytales, like dragons, orcs, goblins, tentacle monsters and all that shit charged out of the portal-thingy and started killing americans.

...the American people are confused, first they were celebrating, now for some unknown reason they are getting reckt-ed by fairytale bullshit.

Some american's tried to kill them all, but the numbers... they are just TOO much!

Next an organised army of roman LARPers with real swords and bows marched out of the portal/gate thing row by row, on the front a guy with a cooler looking armor on a fabulous horse stepped in front of the army, shouting in his native language:

" _DIE THY SLAVES! FOR THIS SAVAGE LAND IS NOW PART OF MY KING'S MONARCHY-IC NATION_!"

The the army equipped their bows each person firing an arrow repeatedly.

Right now the people of America stopped in their tracks while getting killed, stabbed, pierced by arrows. They ignored the massive cosplay bullshit, all because on what the "alien" said.

The American crowd didn't need to understand the other worlders's language... they just need to _patriotically_ feel the meaning of it.

So when they heard " _monarchy_ ", they were annoyed. They are a proud democratic people, filled with pure blood of democracy.

When they heard " _savage_ _land_ ", they were pissed off. Their land is savage? look EVERYWHERE! plain modern boxy buildings, uhh... skyscrapper thing and, and uhh... McDonalds EVERYWHERE! and you think it's savage you roman rejects?!

 _Then_ … when they heard " _slaves_ "... god know's how shitless satan got when he felt the animosity that all the American gave off.

YOU THINK YOU CAN JUST WALTZ IN HERE WITH YOUR STARGATE PORTAL RIPOFF AND ENSLAVE US!

A child running for his life in the chaos, holding his BMG caliber one shot pistol, stopped in his tracks who also heard the roman wannabe's speech, looked at the said roman general guy straight in his eyes, with his pure patriotic eyes telling you, _"get reck."_

The roman general guy laughing needlessly as he watched his army winning, got 36,000,000,000 no-scoped-headshot by that same child from 25 meters.

 ***BANG***...

They were surprised with a mix of confusion done by the sudden thunder. Then when someone among the ranks shouted in panic, " _MY LIEGE!_ " they looked at their glorious leader, missing his head spraying his blood like a fucked-up fountain.

Headless and lifeless, the body of the guy with a cooler looking armor on a fabulous horse (the roman army general guy) fell at the side of his fabulous horse with a thump, making his own small puddle of blood.

After the sudden realisation of the instant death of their leader, eyes wide as plates by surprise, irises shaking showing fear, then continuous screaming and unnecessary gasping.

Looking for the mysterious killer left and right they saw a smoke coming from the unknown something-something from the child in front, or was he/she a mage?

 _"A-ARCHERS SHOOT THAT LITTLE SONUVABITCH!"_ The second in command roman guy shouted angrily.

The Americans _patriotically_ heard that _un-patriotic_ order, they are gonna kill a childz?!

With arrows?!

HERESY! AT LEAST USE BULLETS!

Hundreds of arrows flew through the sky and towards the kid, but before it impales the kid all the arrows are shot off mid-air by endless streams of bullets shot by americans and their automatic guns.

And then uhh... like, minutes later, the americans are pushing back together on where the romans and those fairytale bullshit came from with their firearms slowly and surely.

You know... a simple thing ab _out guns is that they use bull **ets/cartrid** ges to shoot right? well the americ_ _ans are losing fast..._

 _"Oh shit!_ ** _Out of ammo!_ " a random** american, fighting for his/her beloved country shouted.

Then anot _her shouted saying the s ame sentence then another, then another one, etc._

 _"stop copying me!" shouted by the same american with annoyance._

 _At the gate/portal/wor **mhole it came**_ **more roma** ns, it's their rein _forcement! more targe_ t **practice i guess?**

 **Too bad the a _mericans have very_** _litt_ le ammos left, until a mi **racle happened.**

 **A once in a lifeti _me situation-... wait n_ o, sc**ratch that.

 _A once_ in a hundred decad-...nope

Million yea-... still no

uh... chances of trump getting kicked out of the white house?-... maybe.

Out in the ski **es a golden column of light struck down the earth, and aga** in everything and everyone st _ **opped. The imperial army stoppe**_ d attacking, the am **ericans s** topped shooting, even the dumb fairytale creatur **es stopp** _ **ed, to see the mag** nificent sight. Then it s_lowly dissipated revealing a heavenly figure in mid air.

It was...

Captain Rambo Delano. Lincoln,

in his cool lo _oking_ american flag pajama,

wearing **a jacket tha t say 'mu**rica! fuck yea!',

and his fancy hat atop his head,

while holding his long **automatic american-fla** g-painted rifled musket,

 **riding his giant** maj **es** tic eagle that .

 _To the a mericans it wa **s a sight to**_ **beh _old, a me_** _mory_ that wi ll cling unto history till the end of mankind.

To t _he imperia_ _ls? They a_ re shitless havin **g seen t he a**merican _go_ _d, not stupid_ _eno_ ugh to _be inco_ _mpetent th_ at they h _ave angered this_ world's god.

Captain Ra _mbo_ ** _De_ lano.** Lincoln inhale **d, then said _with t_** _he m0st pa_ ** _trioti_ c and heavenly echoi**c voice that **the** **americ** ans ever heard:

 _"With ** _my Ae_** **WSAM** **power**_ **s o** **f** _ **d** **em0Ca** y_c **, i shall ma** **ke t** **he** _ **heaven shit ammu** **nitions!"**_

Fr0m the sky, **like the de m0crati**c god said, it _rain3_ _d gun mag_ azin3 _s c0_ _nta_ ining various c ** _alibers from pist0 l cali_**b3rs t _o rifle c_ _alib3rs to shotgu_ n shells.

T _he american_ s rej0 _iced as t_ ** _he y grabb3d t_**he m4g4zines **and reloaded th3ir** guns, and w3nt b ack to shooting again.

 **Captain _Rambo_ Delano. L**incoln joi **ned the hunt, shooting his _go_** _lden rifle **d musket a**_ **t the inva** ders _causing_ _a 10 **fe**_ **et radius of** colored explosion of blue, red, and white.

 _A **n** D t **H e**n D_ **3 _R_** wa **S** _a N **0c**_ 1 **Ar M!551s lie T _H 4t_ 3**NTU **RD Th3 p0rtle 4nD**

 **BOOOOOOMMMMMMMM!O!OM!OM!OM!O!MO!O!O VBOBBBOBBOBOBMBM!**

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I told you not to read it, right?

* * *

Not drunk author's note:...truth is, i don't even know what to say...


	6. Home, part 1

**To those who read my shitty story I just want to say,**

 **thank you for reading.**

 **And sorry for being late, I was busy irl. And no, this "story" ain't dead.**

 **Note about this chapter.**

 **So right now this is different (because like the summary said; random), not a drunk fic, more like a sane-ish/romance-ish about a couple and their** ** _odd_** **encounter.**

 **Anyways, chapter start!**

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My name is Arata kenshin (AN:I suck at naming), no i'm not some kinda samurai, I am a normal 20 year old office worker.

I look young, even a babyface if you ask my acquaintances.

I just went to work, driving home tired during the peaceful night to my apartment in my sweaty office wear.

Well technically I don't own _the_ apartment.

Exiting my car I looked at the apartment; a big boxy plain building. Nothing special.

But inside my _part_ of apartment? There is someone special inside of my little, humble abode.

And that someone to me is out of this world, both figuratively... and literally speaking.

Going up the stairs to the second floor and to my room apartment.

Outside, I gently knocked the door twice.

"Open the door..." I said, hearing something like feet hitting wood running towards the door.

"Who is it!?" a cute feminine voice replied inside, bit slightly muffled by the door.

"It's me." I replied tiredly.

"Master!'" she replied, still muffled, while irritating Ayato.

"Millis I told you not to call me tha-" I said, interrupted mid-way by the sound of locks clicking and unlocking.

The door opened quickly, revealing a tan female teen with silver colored hair with a silver-colored wolf ears atop her head and a silver-colored tail behind her swinging left and right excitedly, in a white one-piece dress.

A real-ass silver wolf ears AND a real-ass silver tail.

"You're home! My dear _husband~_ " she talked teasingly as she smirk with hunger, making Arata sigh and blush.

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 **Yeaeaeaeh, I know short. This is just part 1. Review or whatever.**

 **Peace out!**


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